Andrew Earles

Final Entry #6….Earles’ 2nd Annual Quasi-Real Time Oscar Blog!!

Posted in Uncategorized by Andrew Earles on February 25, 2007

6.

 

Listen up. The Departed is two shakes above Narc. My previously posted synopsis:

After reading a review of Albert Hammond Jr.’s solo album (on Pitchfork) which failed to mention his father, I felt a need to soften my fit-pitching a tad. I’ve never seen ‘WuJianDao’. It’s not a prerequisite to enjoying, suffering through, or critiqing The Departed. Scorsese did not make a “bad” movie by any stretch, and it’s put together like an engine. But if you think that it eschews standard action/crime movie nonsense for some higher art, you need to watch more movies. And as David Dunlap Jr. (who I saw the film with) asked, “Do Irish gangs even exist anymore?” 

If The Departed proves one thing, it’s that Martin Scorsese has really, really, really, really, bad taste in music. There are three songs in the movie. 

“Gimme Shelter”
by The Rolling Stones 

“I’m Shipping Up To Boston”
Performed by Dropkick Murphys 

“Comfortably Numb”
Performed by Van Morrison & The Band 

But The Departed proves some other things. 

Searching hard for a better than average cop movie? Don’t have a classic rock station in your town? Don’t know any quasi-racist OI ass-bag locker room rapists from which to request a mixed CD? Are other crime films too realistic for you? The Departed may be your movie. 

Everything you’ve read about this movie, which I’m assuming falls under the category of “praise,” is overblown. The Departed is not identifiable as a Scorsese movie (aside from the shitty classic rock), it is identifiable as a merely watch-able crime flick. Nicholson’s character is hard to watch, and even harder to believe. Do kingpins of his power personally attend drug deals? Can he at least dial it down a notch or two? There are better villains in TV crime. Much better. This is not a complex film, as critics have claimed. Nor is it a fast mover. The two and a half (or more) hours do not feel like 90 minutes. Around the two hour mark, you start to feel the minutes grating against your previous expectations of this movie. Maybe The Wire has spoiled me, because that particular example of writing and directing makes The Departed feel like a straight-to-DVD Michael Rooker vehicle. 

And the last scene? Please.

This was, hands down, the most uneventful Oscar ceremony of recent memory, and as such, it sucked the funny right out of me.  

 

 

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  1. sherman said, on February 26, 2007 at 12:56 am

    must have been lifetime achievement award night. Departed was a good afternoon crime drama. Best movie? Ha! Children of Men was far better and the only movie I saw this year worth nominating. I think having the producer (?) of departed accept the award was the worst oscar moment i ever remember. “I would like to thank my broker, my therapist, my masseuse, my driver, my caddy…”


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