Andrew Earles

I have been working all week on my first “PIFSPRHC” (PAY IT FORWARD STIMULUS PACKAGE for the RECORD-HOARDING COMMUNITY) campaign, in which at least 800 – 1,000 records have been purged from my collection. But wait, the best part is coming up:

There will be two prices: $1 and $5…

The great majority of my records would cost you anywhere from 3x to 10x the stickered price. Many of the $5 records will run you $15 to $20 or more…ANYWHERE ELSE!! Also, re: the $5 records…once you break the $30 barrier (and trust me, you will break it, or the person BEHIND YOU IN LINE WILL BREAK IT!!!)…each LP drops to $4 a pop. Let me repeat that…

If you have more than six $5 LP’s in your pile, each ($5) LP after that becomes a $4 LP.

This is the only type of discount I’m comfortable with, so count your shit up accordingly, and let’s do business. Flip beyond the third or fourth $5 LP, and you’ll notice that a closing haggle will be pointless. I’ve already done the haggling for you, right here, alone in my apartment, purging the Conrad Bain Of My Existence.

A note to the other record merchants participating in this record-hustler’s competition: None of my $1 and $5 records are meant as a “spoof” or “parody” of the (sometimes identical, otherwise) logically-priced fare offered at your table(s). Also, feel free to chuckle and murmur amongst yourselves about how I’m “being taken” or letting things go for insane prices…I won’t be able to hear you above the rapid-fire exchange of money for goods occurring at my perpetually-three-to-four-people-deep table!

MAY THE BEST MERCHANT WIN!!

THIS WILL TAKE PLACE AT SHANGRI-LA RECORDS, SUNDAY NOV. 1st

1916 MADISON AVENUE, MEMPHIS TN 901-274-1916